#10 「ドエムＺ世代」

Zero Posts in September — "Only Things I Can't Say on YouTube Come to Mind"

Miyako, whose channel is approaching 900,000 subscribers, did not upload a single YouTube video in September. The reason, she explains, is that her private life has come to be composed entirely of people and things connected to YouTube. In the early days she could vent frustrations almost directly on camera, but as the channel grew, speaking her mind honestly risked getting "blacklisted." Before she can even begin talking, an internal voice cuts in — "Are you really going to say that again?" — locking her in a yips-like state where words simply stop coming. She compared the feeling to the publicized struggles of a celebrity in the news at the time. September's relentless rain only deepened the slump, though she laughed it off: "It's the rain's fault — not mine!"

She declared she would try a challenge for this episode: stay positive, no trash-talking. By her own admission — "For three years all I've talked about is other people's flaws; I've never managed anything else" — it lasted less than eight minutes.

Follow-ups and Life Updates — Abazurezu Returns, Digital Detox

In the previous episode, Miyako had referred to a woman studying abroad as "Abazurezu" (アバズレズ) — a label she herself called "extremely rude." That woman, or someone believed to be her, subsequently appeared in the comment section: "After hearing Nōka Neki's perspective, I'm reconsidering my relationship with her. I'm correcting my own thoughtless behavior. Thank you." Miyako suspected at first it might be an impersonator, but ultimately sent warm wishes: "I love humanity, so please stay happy."

On the one sunny day September offered, she borrowed the grounds of a wealthy acquaintance's villa for a digital detox — swaying in a hammock, reading in dappled light, surrounded by nature. In that moment she thought, "I should quit YouTube; I can't keep putting myself in such a toxic space." The practical reality is that "there's no way I could work at a normal company at this point." She had childhood dreams of becoming Thomas the Tank Engine, then a TV reporter — gave that up and went to art university — then started YouTube rather than face job hunting. Now she doesn't even want to do YouTube, and that is where she finds herself.

Exchange Diary — An Exceptionally Dense Round of Listener Submissions

**Miyamoto-ya-san (16):** During a low point in junior high, a male classmate tore a scrap of notebook paper and wrote "Smile, girl" on it. She still tells herself those words today. Miyako reflected on her own high laughing threshold, then cited her biggest recent laugh: a hot-pot dinner with her friend Keily (ケイリー) escalated into a game of showing each other what was in their mouths, culminating in Keily expelling an entire nose-full without a tissue.

**Sōryō Botcchaman-san (埼玉):** On February 22, 2016, in fourth grade, this listener made five black-lily origami figures — the black lily's flower meaning being "curse and revenge" — and tucked them into a popular classmate's birthday lunchbox with a note reading "Happy Birthday, Dark Affliction." She then followed the classmate home to confirm the origami had not been thrown away. Rumors spread and she earned the nickname "Kuroyuriko" (Black Lily Child), which she loved — until 2026, when a close friend revealed that everyone had secretly been calling her "Kuro Unko" (Black Poop).

**Paipanman-san (神奈川, 23):** Raised on a diet of S&M erotic fiction, she is a committed masochist. In her fourth year of university she got her first boyfriend, who asked her to issue repeated apologies — "I'm sorry for feeling good," "I'm sorry for making such a face" — and she went along with it at first. As things escalated, she snapped, shouted "Why do I have to apologize? You die," and ended the relationship. She looks back on it as a good experience for working through her S&M fantasies, and asked Miyako: "What would you do if someone demanded you apologize?" Miyako answered: "I'd say it, but being told to would make me go completely stone-faced — like I'm in a horror movie."

**Dobubachi-san (神奈川, 40, creator):** A graduate of Tokyo University of the Arts (東京藝術大学). While still enrolled, she became pregnant by a fellow student at 20, gave birth amid social backlash, and completed both her undergraduate and graduate degrees. She became the household's breadwinner while her husband held no steady job, eventually making her living entirely as a creator. As her income rose, her husband grew jealous and began harassing her; they divorced a few years ago. She receives no child support but says "life without a partner is wonderful." That child is now in high school. She also shared some Geidai trivia: music students tend to come from wealthy families, while art students are often broke.

Aban Dainagon — The Weird Habits Corner

**Yume no Naka de wa K-pop Idol-san (和歌山, male, 19):** His hobby is taste-testing cosmetics. He recommends Manyo's Galactomyces Cleansing Toner for its bitter opening that gives way to a shine-muscat-like sweetness. Miyako's verdict: "Please get sick."

**Butagoya-san (東京, male):** During university he let laundry pile up until a damp T-shirt was his only option. He tried it, found the cool sensation pleasant, and has deliberately chosen damp clothes ever since — feeling the fabric dry through the day gives him a sense of "I'm alive." Miyako fired back "Don't mess with me, you pig!" then quietly admitted she had worn yesterday's clothes today.

**Ohanami-Kensaku-san (東京, female, 19, vocational student):** When sashimi appears at dinner, she heats miso soup to scalding and shabu-shabus the raw fish in it — just enough to lightly cook the surface. The broth takes on the dashi and fat and stays delicious to the last drop. Her mother says "gross" every time. Miyako's reaction: "That might actually be fine — that's a life hack."

**Garigarikkarintō-san (大阪, female, 17):** She suffers from an involuntary word-substitution "disease" that strikes at the worst moments. At a family hot-pot dinner, the instant she saw enoki mushrooms her brain rendered them as "enoki-ntama" (enoki-balls). The transcript ends there.