#143 忘れられない誕生日エピソード

kemio at 31 Declares Himself Part of the "Demon Realm Lineage"

kemio's birthday is September 16. The episode was recorded before he actually turned 31, with the release going live the day after his birthday. "This past year felt like the fastest of my entire life — so this is how we slowly die," he laughed, marveling at how quickly time moves.

For this year's birthday he plans to go bowling in New York with friends — though bowling in New York is, in his words, "a life-or-death event," with all-you-can-drink and pizza included for four people running roughly ¥100,000.

As for birthday posts: none this year. His reasoning is that he'd rather people associate him with Halloween. Going forward, he is declaring himself part of the "demon realm lineage" — like Kano Mika — and will stop making any public statements about his age. "I'm aiming to become a monster," he added.

The Birthday Culture Gap Between Japan and America

In Japan, it is standard for close friends to take the lead — organizing surprises, dinners, and parties — while the birthday person plays guest. In the US, the birthday person is the host: you plan the dinner yourself and invite your friends. After moving to America, kemio struggled to adjust and ended up barely celebrating his birthdays at all for a while. It was only at 30 that he finally organized his first proper event with friends.

His partner Miles has maintained a standing tradition since they first met: every year, Miles bakes a platter of a dozen or so cupcakes reading "Happy Birthday kemio." The tradition almost lapsed once, but kemio "protested with everything he had" and it has continued ever since. The cupcakes are now so ingrained that birthdays and Miles's cupcakes are inseparable in his mind.

Listener Stories: Unforgettable Birthday Moments

This episode centers on listener-submitted stories. Highlights include:

**Bimoji Minarai-san (32):** On the eve of her birthday, her replacement at work overslept and she held down the shift alone. She made it home on the verge of tears — only to find friends had decorated her front door for her birthday.

**Kyonkyon-san (22):** Her family of five climbed Mt. Fuji on her birthday. During a water break, her mother quietly produced a musical birthday card for a mid-hike surprise.

**Yuma-san (28):** Three friends invited her to lunch in high school. During the meal, one of them absentmindedly said, "If the surprise here is good, I want to do mine here too" — and the surprise was instantly blown.

**Min-sensei-san (28):** Her boyfriend booked a hotel as a birthday surprise. When she realized she had no underwear or cosmetics with her, he said, "I've got it covered" — he had quietly let himself into her apartment and packed her things. She called him "half a burglar," but appreciated that he had remembered every detail.

**Mechakyara Akisou na Watashi-san (23):** She has a jinx: she always gets broken up with just before her birthday and has no memory of ever celebrating it in a big way.

**Kaido-san:** With nothing she particularly wanted, she paid for her own ceramic dental work in advance and handed over the receipt for her partner to "gift" back to her.

kemio's Best Birthday of His Life

On his 27th birthday — during the pandemic — kemio and four friends had tickets to a Kaytranada (ケイチャナーダ) event featuring R&B artist Joyce Wrice. About three hours before the show, a DM arrived from Joyce Wrice herself — someone kemio had never met and shared no mutual connections with — saying, "I've got a show in NY tonight, want to come?" He replied that he actually already had a ticket; she responded by inviting him backstage. After the show she came down to meet him, wished him happy birthday, and gave him a signed CD. They spent part of the evening together. "Why the DM ever arrived is still a mystery I haven't solved," kemio says.

The Art of the Birthday Confession — and the Day Cheesy Guys Went Extinct

Listeners also sent in heart-flutter stories of birthday confessions from their school days. One involved a boy winning a relay race at an elementary-school sports day that fell on a listener's birthday, then handing over his medal and confessing on the spot. Another featured a boy who had been listening to a listener's relationship troubles showing up at her door with a scarf and saying, "Want to know who I like?… It's you."

kemio lamented, "Where did people like that go?" He declared that if anyone wanted to confess to him on his birthday, the ultimate move would be sending a playlist made specifically for him. "If someone did that, I would marry them that day." But since "people like that no longer exist," he officially designated October 17 — the day after his birthday — as "the day cheesy guys went extinct from the world."